A mum has been left shaken after her son left a birthday party without a party bag.
The anonymous relative took to the social media forum Mumsnet asking other parents if she was being unreasonable after admitting that while her son wasn’t too bothered, she couldn’t help but rant about it.
She went on to explain that her son also didn’t get a birthday present on his special day from the other kids, and stressed that she doesn’t think the family has “health issues”. ‘money’ to excuse them for not giving a gift and then a good bag later.
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Turning to Mumsnet, a popular online forum asking for help and asking if she was out of place for being so angry.
She wrote: “A kid came in half the DS [Dear Son] party – he couldn’t do the activity so he picked up the pizza from a pizzeria – obviously I paid for all the pizzas. This kid didn’t bring any gifts, just a “map” on a piece of paper he had drawn on. He got a party bag at the DS party. I felt like it was a bit rude to come to a party without a present – but who cares, the kids have enough cr** that they don’t need more – but that was a party where only five children were invited, so it stuck. I wouldn’t have noticed otherwise.
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“This morning, DS went to this child’s party, which was an activity, not food. About eight children. waited until the end.) DS obviously gave a gift.
“AIBU [Am I being unreasonable] to find it rather cheeky?!”
She added: “(Also – this family is not poor or has no money problems. In fact, I would call them well-off. I know that for sure. Mentioning only in case people say that they can’t afford a gift or party bag.) Anyway, glad to hear that I’m petty and boring and should mentally keep my mouth shut about it. nobody and I won’t, but inside I think that’s rude. (DS isn’t particularly bothered anymore but was sad at the time to be the only kid without a party bag.) “
The post prompted fellow Mumsnet users to share their thoughts on the party’s situation, with most saying the party bag seemed the biggest concern, rather than the mother’s son not getting any. gift.
Others pointed out that “just a card” is actually a handmade card, which is more thoughtful and gentle.
But one user commented: “That sounds a little off. I always packed enough bags and then some spares in case any stray siblings showed up.”
To which the original poster replied, “Same – I always have spares in case that happens or I’m crazy counting.”
She also added: Agree with the other poster calling me petty – I kinda know that and I’m only seething inside – but I’m taking extra bags because I’d hate for a child to be left out if I was the host then I expect other parents to do the same! (And DS was invited, not an extra.)”, admitting that she knew she was a little “petty”.
Another mum replied, “It’s not the child’s fault, but it’s really awful. Isn’t standard party bag planning ‘preparing more bags than guests, just in case ? Looks like they were over-invited and assumed there would be dropouts.”
“What probably happened was that a sibling took one or was given one by their sibling, not realizing there wouldn’t be enough for them. brothers and sisters. I had to guard the party bags like a hawk and control their distribution. at the end of my DS parties because I’ve seen kids do this at other people’s homes. Best thing to do now n It’s not to make a big fuss about it and say it would be mostly cake, so let’s have a cake that we like, etc. I’ll soon forget that.” A reassured.
A fourth said: “I think it’s sad to leave a child without a party bag, when all the other children had one. I probably would have taken a few pieces out of the other bags and improvised if I were the parents and that I had miscalculated, rather than leave a child with nothing.”
But stressed that not having a present wouldn’t be a concern: “I wouldn’t mind not bringing a present to your child’s party. You shouldn’t expect presents.”
Another echoed that people shouldn’t expect freebies but could understand why the original poster was upset. They said: “I’m really in the camp of not expecting xy and z and everyone does things differently. But being part of a party where everyone has a party bag except you is a awful feeling.”
One of them sympathized with the mother and said: “I am not surprised that your DS is upset and of course that you are upset for him.”
Meanwhile, a mum suggested it was no accident. “There are only eight kids left and no party bags??? No, it wasn’t an accident. Call me cynical, but the kid/parents don’t really like your kid and were just after the gift you gave. Sorry if this is harsh but otherwise none of this makes sense.”